this weekend it felt like summer

This weekend, it felt like summer. We were in Havasu all weekend enjoying the 85 degree weather, swimming in the lake, boating, sliding down water slides, listening to country music, eating bbq and being with our friends. I wore nothing but sundresses and swim suits, I slept very little and swam an awful lot. Tomorrow, I go back to school and today I had to pick classes for next semester. What a sweet time summer is, nestled between every day life and school just time to enjoy the sun and the heat and friends and swimming. Growing up I remember summer being about lemoniade stands and homemade popsicles and play dates every day and as I've gotten older it's become much more about working and saving money and taking summer classes, this summer that is changing becuase this weekend? this weekend felt like real summer, not the one focused on saving and work and stress the one focused on fun and friends and vacations. So this summer I am determinded to make it a real summer. I need to enjoy them while they last, and maybe I'll document more!

checking in

Okay you guys, it's been a longgg time... I started this blog as a journal, so I had a place to put my thoughts, feelings and experiences. I really loved having a place to do that and then I found myself being concerned about how the layout looked, how often I was posting and what I was posting about, that is so silly because this is me and my life! I would get writers block... on what basically is a journal! Hopefully this will be able to stop and I will write whatever I want and I'm hoping this leads to more posts! Hehe :) Happy End of febuary!

I recently read an a post over at on Andrea's blog about checking in on each other and it really touched my heart. In relationships it's so easy to get selfish (at least in mine it is! Haha) Ryan just cares so much about me and I know he would do anything to make me happy, it's so easy to be selfish and only do the things I want because he's willing. Sometimes I forget that it's important that he's happy too, I don't always ask his opinions or  listen to him, but I'm trying.
This past weekend, we went away for a little trip just us, we stayed in flagstaff but went out to an area where neither of us had phone service, we cooked dinner, played games and mostly just caught up, we had a chance to talk about our relationship what we like and dislike and what will help us grow together. Last night we talked for hours, I got ice cream and we worked things through. It's nice to check in on each other once in a while, it's nice to know what he's feeling and have a chance to express my wants and needs. I love checking in on each other. It's hard to do because I get emotional and he's not always super happy when we do but afterwards I feel so much better that we talked (hoping he does too!) We don't always have things figured out but it's nice to at least get these conversations started and figure the rest out as we go!

I love this man, I am so blessed by him.

friday letters!! yayy

dear Ryan,

 I hope you have a fun adventure this weekend. 

thanks for making sure I felt extra loved before you left, you are so willing to serve me, i hope that I make you feel even half as loved as you make me feel. I love giggling with you and going on adventures. I know lately I've been so lame and don't do to many fun things with you due to homework but i love that you make everything fun.

dear Stevie,

thanks for being on of the best roommates around and keeping me company all day and being willing to help me craft and making me laugh and letting me vent. I have truly been blessed in the roommate department even when I'm busy with work and school and spend all my free time with Ryan ya'll are there for me no matter what.

dear Bowden,

my cute little 7 mo. old. I have loved nannying for you and your brothers and am so excited that your mom has asked me to watch you boys for the next couple months but last night was rough for both of us. I'm sorry you are teething but maybe next time you can try not to wake up 3+ times a night? I love you very much but you have made me very sleepy.

dear group projects,

oh how I loathe you. You have made my life very difficult but I am grateful for this oppertunity to learn patience and time management because between this project and all my other homework my planner is a neccasity. maybe we'll get along better next year?

thanks.

happy weekend folks!

tuesday thoughts

sometimes life blesses you with really great surprises in the form of canceled classes.

let me start off by explaining that this year has been a busy one for Ryan & I! Our schedules are so opposite and I'm on a farther away campus then last year and my work hours (that I actually really love) don't always line up with his life and his new position for his fraternity is more demanding the last year, as are our classes. So the little time we do get together is usualy spent doing homework and being lame, and I've been really grumpy about the business (he's handled it a lot better). but then today something wonderful happened! My morning class got out early so a friend of Ryans offered me a ride home and as we were driving Ryan called and told me to have Ethan drop me off at his place because his class was canceled!! Yayy!! We had TWO WHOLE HOURS before I had to be to work and Ryans next class started. So we took full advantage of that little gift and he went to Oregano's pizza joint for lunch.

& a lovely lunch date it was! 

We have been dating for almost a full year and we talked about how we were going to celebrate! We planned some fun trips and I finally got to spend some un-interupted time with my guy.

Oh, how I love him! Life has been so crazy and fun and busy and awesome lately! I'm so lucky I have someone to share it with! 

happy tuesday, friends xx

I hope you got some little surprises today:)

It's gonna be a long hot summer

You guys.

Today is the day I have been literally dreading since Christmas. Ryan and I said goodbye for the summer.

In my mind it's not that bad.

In my mind he's not that far.

In my mind I won't miss him  to much because we'll talk every day.

In my mind I'll see him soon.

but in my heart.... it sucks.

Last night he was giving me lots of hugs and telling me it was going to be okay but all I could think about was who is going to give me these kinds of hugs? Who's going to go get ice cream with me when I'm sad? Who's going to watch dumb shows with me and give me advice and let me vent. Who is going to give me forehead kisses and make me happy. 

but then this morning when I saw him and he had his sleepy eyes that I love so much I didn't feel as bad or as selfish. There were lots of tears as we loaded up his car with the rest of my stuff and dropped it off at my new apartment, when I left my empty dorm room and loaded his car up with his stuff this time. 

We went to brunch with his parents and then finally we got in his car so he could drop me off in my apartment. We sat in his car for a good amount of time. Getting all the hugs and kisses in we could, then he got out of the car and hugged me reaaal tight. We said goodbye and I walked up the stairs to my apartment and cried a little bit more. I cried to Emily and sat with her while she packed to go home for the summer, she gave me necessary hugs and made me smile. She's a good friend. 

I already miss him so much my heart hurts and my head hurts from crying so much but he is the best. 

4 months is easy peazy. 

We will be okay, I already can't wait to see him!